City Lights

In the rain pouring outside

I could wait for the last train to nowhere

But I chose to waste my time in the car

Now you’re driving me home

My self-doubt is at its peak

The city lights are all a blur

Like I could never have them all

So I’ll wait here until July

But freedom doesn’t come easy

I just wanna recognize

The things that I should set my eyes on

But I always look away intentionally

Like my father did

Like everyone does

Am I giving up on my dreams?

I can’t find a change in the weather

Nothing seems real

There’s too much BZD in my blood

I’m running for the hills

Is it for the view of the city

Or an escape from life?

If the latter is the case

There are no second chances at all

And the city lights will be gone for good

Grasping what I have lost is the last chance

To break out and wade through all these broken dreams on my bed

You don’t know what I have been through

Now the city lights turn on and off

In a blink I might miss them all

So I keep my eyes wide open

But there’re tears down my cheek

How could this be my last dance

With you under this circumstance?

In an awkward silence between us

I’m convinced that...

You’ll walk away when I’m done with my happy ending

Am I giving up on my dreams?

I can’t find a change in the weather

Nothing seems real

There’s too much BZD in my blood

I’m running for the hills

Is it for the view of the city

Or an escape from life?

If the latter is the case

There are no second chances at all

And the city lights will be gone

Still trying to turn the table for the unattainable dreams I had when I was young

I can’t let go of them

Forgive me for being such a useless person

I’m weary of what I’ve become

What I’ve become

Am I giving up on my dreams?

I can’t find a change in the weather

Nothing seems real

There’s too much BZD in my blood

I’m running for the hills

Is it for the view of the city

Or an escape from life?

If the latter is the case

There are no second chances at all

And the city lights will be gone for good

For good

(I’m still asking myself)